These are questions that mull around in the back of my mind. Why did God make me? What does He want me to accomplish? What is the vision for my life? Right now, I feel like I can't quite see exactly where God wants my life to be going. Every time I've prayed about it, or asked others to pray for me about this, the result has been big--and vague. "God has huge plans for your life!" "God is going to take what you see your life being and make it so much bigger than you can imagine!" "You are a leader and you are going to influence people!" "Don't settle on second rate or too small!"
All these wonderful, encouraging things that can be found true by searching scripture or looking at my actions, but not clear direction. So then I think about what I really love doing.
- I love being with friends, and my favorite situations are one on one, talking about life, problems, and solutions to those problems. I love sharing and receiving wisdom so much, and anything about God is a favorite topic of mine.
- I also like taking this to a larger setting--like sharing at a youth group or my college group about what God is teaching me.
- Then the other top thing I love doing is making things--creative crafts. I really love working with items, like 3D artwork--ie. three things I've done lately: making combinations of buttons into magnets, painting pottery, or decorating a masquerade mask.
- I also enjoy creating logos and graphic art--I've designed a bunch of brochures and sermon series at work.
- Writing has always been a passion of mine and I have been told I'm not that bad at it, so it definitely makes the list.
- Another interest is theatre, mainly from the directing/technical standpoint, but acting too.
But I don't know where God wants me to focus... and who knows, there may be something completely different that God wants me to do that I'll be even more passionate about then this stuff!
Though at times I feel frustrated and clueless about the direction of my life, wise people around me have offered some great input. First off, my friends have reminded me that I have only been married just over 3 months. My marriage is so important and being the best wife I can be IS significant. My job takes up the majority of my time, and it truly is rewarding to serve my church with my gifts. I really am blessed that my work is so meaningful and that it has a great work environment!
Finally, God has been putting this call on my heart to pray for well over a year. This summer I started praying first thing every morning, and it has been so rewarding! I am hoping to do more intercessory prayer (prayer for others, rather than just the things in my life) as well. When I ask God what He wants me to do, "pray" is generally the answer, so I am slowly making that a bigger part of my life. I'll admit, sometimes this has been discouraging to hear because I'm so hungry for a detailed strategy for my life. Prayer can sometimes seem "boring" or "small." But God has been answering my prayers is very visible ways--and I am learning more and more about it's value, and how huge it really is.
So for now, my "vision" is to be the best wife, church administrator, and pray-er I can be!
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